Futile Efforts

I’m thankful for the weekend just like I’m thankful for New Year’s Day each year.  Because in my mind it’s the perfect time to “start over.”

A fresh week.

A chance to have a better track record next week than I did this week.

Sunday church service is the perfect precursor to Monday morning.  It helps push a re-set button in me, reminding me of what an awesome God I serve and how His mercies are new every morning.

I like getting a clean slate to work with.

Even if it’s just in my mind.

This week was by no means terrible.  On Monday Grace and I ran errands for a friend and had fun in the process.

Tuesday I had lunch and a play date with a good friend I don’t see nearly enough & I also had my weekly Bible Study at church which I love.

Wednesday was Andy’s birthday, and boy did I love celebrating him!  He has been such a blessing in my life and one that I’ve too often taken for granted.

Grace and I had fun baking his favorite triple layer chocolate cake and preparing succulent filet mignon for dinner along with loaded baked potatoes and steamed broccoli.  To say it was delicious would be an understatement.  We ate dinner on our fine china and Grace and I wore party dresses and fancy shoes.  We decorated the dining room with banners and streamers and lit candles at meal time.  It was just a little way to make the evening special for someone who is so very special to us.

I think it was yesterday that was the real downer of the week.  I was just in a weird funk and couldn’t seem to snap out of it.  No matter how many things I accomplished.

Usually that’s my go-to method for feeling better.

I get crap done.

I know better than to think that weariness in my soul can be “cured” with activity, but I give it my best effort every time.  Foolishly.

Yesterday I mowed the lawn then vacuumed the office and washed the walls in preparation for the upcoming paint job.  But I still felt low.

I read the assigned reading for my Bible Study, and although I gained some great insight, I still didn’t shake my funk.

I even listened to my daily Bible readings read audibly on my handy new YouVersion iPhone app. But nada.

You know what I didn’t do?

Really pray about it.

You know, humble myself and open up before God asking Him to pull me out of it.  To take care of me because I’m weak and feeble.

Cast your cares upon Him, for He cares for you.  1 Peter 5:7

He promises to carry our burdens for us.

But we have to let Him.

We have to open ourselves up and turn our cares over to Him rather than cling to them tightly like a silly toddler shouting, “I do it!”

Yeah, I may have heard that a time or two around here lately :)

You would think I’d watch Grace struggling with something she clearly needs my help with and I’d see that I’m just like that when I do the same thing to God.

But we can be so blind to our own foolishness.

Instead of turning our cares over to an almighty God who loves us, we shout, “I do it!”

Well, we just weren’t meant to do it.  We were created to need Him and it’s a beautiful thing when we allow ourselves to.

Today is going to be a better day.

And it’s not because I have a killer to-do list that I plan to fully check off.

It’s because I’m loved by the God of the universe and He promises to take care of me.

And today?

I’m going to let Him.