I’m Not Like You

I may have your eyes, nose and chin, but

I’m not like you.

I may have a strong personality, but

I’m not like you.

I may walk like you and stand like you, but

I’m nothing like you.

I’ve weathered storms during my 8 year marriage. I’ve said hurtful things. I’ve made mistakes. I’ve put myself first and wondered what life might be like with someone else, but

unlike you, I’ve pressed on. I’ve leaned on God for help, I’ve admitted my wrongs and I’ve chosen to try my damnedest to be the kind of wife that my husband deserves.

I’ve snapped at my little girl, and been crabby and irritable, and at times a poor example, but

unlike you, I’ve spent hours just being with her. Wondering at her amazing little self. Bathing her in love and affection because she’s my child and I love her more than myself.

I’ve gotten excited about new plans and ideas. I’ve bored people by talking about them too much. I’ve struggled with imbalance when I’ve gotten a new obsession, but

unlike you, I don’t alienate people when they’re not as excited about it as me. I value the people around me more than the ideas I get stuck in my head. I’m more concerned with others knowing how much I care, than I am with them knowing how much I know.

I’ve been bored with my job, I’ve struggled with doing my best on days that I feel lazy, I’ve gotten my feelings hurt by my boss and I’ve been cranky with my co-workers, but

unlike you, I stick it out. I push myself to be better and try harder. I take the hurt feelings and try to improve. I apologize when I offend my co-workers. I learn from my mistakes and I do everything I can to honor God in my work. I don’t run away. I don’t get myself fired.

I’ve been irritated by my family members. I’ve struggled in relationship with my siblings, I haven’t always seen eye to eye with my mom, but

unlike you, I love on them anyway. I don’t say hurtful things behind their backs and avoid them. I work through the issues, I apologize when I need to and I spend time with them, building stronger bonds because family is what’s left when everything else fades away.

I’ve been a shitty Christian. I’ve served myself, I’ve avoided my Bible, I’ve ditched prayer for “me” time. I’ve touted scriptures and ideals that I haven’t lived up to. I’ve gotten mad at God, I’ve wrestled with His commands, I’ve been a hypocrite, and I’ve failed to show others the grace that has been shown to me, but

unlike you, I haven’t gone out and done the thing I spent decades judging others for. I haven’t intentionally walked away from a sacred covenant. I haven’t willfully disobeyed God and then skewed scripture in an attempt to justify my actions.

I may look like you and I may carry your genes, and I may not be anywhere near perfect, but I want you to know that who I am, the real me, is nothing like you.