Two words.
I know that sleep training is a highly controversial topic in the momosphere and the blogosphere, but I have to say (at the risk of being shunned) that I’m totally on board with it.
The first couple weeks of Avery’s life were pretty rough on me. Like I’ve mentioned before, lack of sleep is my kryptonite and I was getting barely any sleep and I was stressed to the max trying to keep Avery from crying at night and waking Andy or Grace.
That’s what you call a recipe for disaster.
Back when Grace was an infant, I read Baby Wise like it was the Bible. I only took 8 weeks of maternity leave, so I knew I had to get Grace onto a predictable schedule if I was going to have any chance at all of successfully working from home. Those 8 weeks felt like a ticking time bomb, so I read the book and started implementing the practices after the first week she was home.
It worked beautifully with Grace and she’s been sleeping through the night since she was about 3 months old. She goes down great for naps and doesn’t fight bedtime either. The whole process was such a blessing and gave us the gift of a happy, well-rested little girl. And a happy, well-rested mama!
Fast forward two and a half years…
SOMEHOW I FORGOT EVERYTHING.
Seriously, I have no idea how I successfully sleep trained one child and in a couple of years forgot it all. I’ll blame it on my hormones ;)
At the end of Avery’s first week, I headed down to the basement to search the bookshelves for Baby Wise. We have 4 giant bookshelves completely full of all kinds of books, so this was no simple task. Andy grouped the books according to themes once upon a time but in the past year or so I’ve managed to derail much of his system by grabbing books and not putting them back in the right spot. Sorry babe! :(
The first time I looked for the book, I had Avery in my arms so it was kind of tricky. Not to mention that my hoarder personality has managed to block the bottom half of most of the shelves with bins of other crap. Oy!
The second time I looked for it I was alone and really dug around but still couldn’t find the book.
Womp. Womp. Womp.
I’m pretty sure that I lent it out to an expectant mother telling her how it was the greatest thing since sliced bread and that it saved my sanity during the newborn phase. But I can’t for the life of me remember who I lent it to :(
Andy to the rescue!
When Andy ordered his textbooks for this semester, he added a used copy of Baby Wise and by the middle of this past week the book had arrived!
{insert Hallelujah chorus}
I read the whole book that day and felt like I had a new lease on life! I went into that night knowing that I still might not get enough sleep, but at least I had a plan!
Right away I figured out the times that I wanted Avery to eat (7, 10, 1, 4, 7, 10 & as needed overnight) and I began the magic cycle…
Eat
Awake
Sleep
So simple yet so effective.
I remembered that this was the order of things, but I’d forgotten that feeding on demand could make Avery cranky from getting too much milk or only snacking and not getting regular “full feedings.” I’d also forgotten that babies may have to cry a little bit before they settle into sleep.
**Let me just say that I am NOT a proponent of letting babies cry for extended periods of time. I know that they are fragile and new to the outside world and that it’s crucial that they are cuddled and comforted and that their needs are met before they become hysterical.**
Amazingly enough, Avery’s mood during her awake times drastically improved once I regulated her feeding times and didn’t just put her on the boob every time she got fussy.
Also amazing was how little she really had to cry before getting herself to sleep. I watch the clock religiously when laying her down to sleep and even though her little cries feel like an eternity and make me sad, they settle into sleep after only a short while!
The result has been that I feel so much happier and at peace and Avery also seems happier. I’ve been able to bond more with her because I’m not irritated by not knowing what to expect from her feeding and sleep times. Andy is happier having his wife back and I’m sure Grace can tell that mama isn’t a big grouch anymore!
I know that many of my online friends prefer attachment parenting methods to sleep training, and I think that’s wonderful! As long as it works for them and fits into the dynamics of their families, I say more power to them.
Parenting isn’t easy and we all need to love and encourage one another along the journey. I’m very thankful for the moms that have gone before me and recommended the Baby Wise book to me because it is what works for us.
I’m so happy to be back :)
P.S. I also want to give a shout out to my mom for having the girls and me for an overnight visit this week! She took such wonderful care of us and gave me the chance to get caught up on sleep while she entertained both girls. Love you mom!